Sunday, February 13, 2011

Show Your Desire

I was at a blog (dissention dot wordpress dot com), written by an omega, which I check out sometimes to give me things to think about. It also gives me something to measure myself against.

There was a post on porn vs. real women that referenced this article which had this comment at the bottom (note the sentence I put in bold):
By JJFrank on 01/31/2011 at 12:06pm
Contrary to this article's headline, the male libido is obviously not disappearing, it is just focusing in a different direction than live women. I would speculate that the reason is that online women seem to want to have sex and seems to always enjoy it. That is what turns men on. It is not due to the shape of the body or the equipment.
It is the porn stars obvious and expressive desire, appreciation and satisfaction.
First of all he's wrong. Not only are shape and equipment hella important, but the reasons for the proliferation of pornography are much simpler (supply and demand) and much more complex (natural addiction). That said, his hypothesis about expressing desire is insightful. Obviously, men and women want to have sex with people who are sexually attractive to them. Once that requirement is met, we prefer to have sex with people that are expressive with their own sexual desire.

To illustrate the point:

Would you fuck an ugly girl who's shy and doesn't put much effort into it?
--Probably Not.

Would you fuck a cute girl who's shy and doesn't put much effort into it?

Would you fuck an ugly girl who screams and rams her crotch into your dick?
--Probably not.

Would you fuck a cute girl who screams and rams her crotch into your dick?
--Hell. Yes.

So a girl who REALLY wants to fuck AND really gets off on it is VERY attractive, provided she's not repulsive and her desire is not a caricature of porn and so over the top that you think she's exaggerating (which, of course, is a turn off because then it seems fake and causes you to question whether she is enjoying it at all, which takes you out of the moment).

What he's pointing at goes both ways. When in the bedroom, women get off on men who show they're enjoying themselves as well, which was eloquently said in this craigslist post.

Show your desire:
Our society already curtails our sexual expression. It is frowned upon for a man to be overtly sexual. The last thing you want to do is self-castrate. Men want to bang. Women like to be desired.

Am I saying stare at your coworkers' tits? No. But I'm also not saying don't do it unless you're like Fred Armison in a Sexual Harrassment video. As men we need to shun this PC idea of hiding our urges. Tom Brady's character in that SNL skit is absurd, but if you are Alpha, groomed, and dress well, you can pull off a sexual vibe at work without flak from HR.

Now translate that to gaming in field:
If you go out trying to meet women and you keep it PC (sterile), you're going to be LJBF'd or they're going to think you're a 'nice' guy. Apply sexual tension/energy. Make her feel like you want to bang her. Take up space. Take up HER space (both meanings). Make her feel your presence with body language and no matter what the subject matter, the underlying message is clear: she is a sexual object, you want to fuck her, and it is a completely normal and acceptable thing.

Of course it can go too far as Bhodisatta found with Over-Intent.
As he says, keep the vibe playful.

By showing your desire (using sexual tension) she will know that you want to bang, which will do one of two things:
1. Blow you out.
2. Get you laid.

A blow out is good. You aren't wasting time hoping it goes somewhere and you can move on to the next girl.

Remember: You've got to risk it to get the biscuit.

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